Recap Day 2

So yesterday went GREAT! I didn't starve myself and I was able to keep the food cravings to a minimum. Babe took me shopping after work and was really helpful with helping me plan out meals for the next week or two. That's exciting for me because I feel like I am actually taking steps to getting back on track rather than just running my mouth about it. As for workouts, I have yet to start any. I had plans to go with my sis last night but after grocery shopping it just got too late for both of us, so we have made plans for tonight. ---FYI I skipped the movie too.

Well that was pretty much the highlight of yesterday and I just wanted to share with you all. Be in touch soon. :)

End of Day 1

Well it's midnight and I'm still up and I have not snacked! I'm gettin a little anxious but I'm getting ready to turn off the tv and hopefully end my day dreaming about fries, pb & j's, & anything & everything else that has popped into my head since dinner at 8pm. I logged my calories for the day and I'm not proud to say I am way under because I know that's not healthy but I have nothing currently in my kitchen that I can consider a "good choice". Toldja...I really gave up on myself and stop stocking my kitchen of the right stuff. Fortunately, I received some money I had been waiting for today and I plan on purchasing things I NEED to be eating tomorrow.

Off Subject-
Geez...I'm still thinking about food!! ...Bad food!! I feel like I'm going nuts right now

Back to subject-
Since I thought I was flat broke I didn't plan on hitting the gym because the fuel light came on and I was already stressing off gas to get home let alone gas to get to the gym. Now that I have money for gas, me and my sis plan on seeing Breaking Dawn again tomorrow (jumps for joy) then gym afterwards. Yes, I know I could of did something at home but I feel like I'm battling food demons and it is not a good feeling. Feeling like this reminds me how bad I hit rock bottom again! I really am starting all over and this feeling sucks!

It's funny but not ...but I have asked my hunny to be my "food sponsor". People laugh when I say that and to be honest it does sound kinda lame but I really need one. I constantly crave bad foods (during the first weeks of cleansing) and I am not the type of person to go get it myself. I beg, bitch, & cry to have it brought to me but I will not get my big ass up and go get it myself. Lol you are probably thinking damn I should be skinny if I never go get bad food but nope my Dad and Hunny will cook or buy me food because that's just what my family does to show affection we feed each other. Really, I don't know how many times I have been having a bad day and my dad or hunny will bring me a favorite food to cheer me up. Food is equivalent to a hug around here.& for all the other days ...I'm just spoiled and am used to getting what I want when I ask. Sounds bratty but hey, I'm just being honest. So back to babe being my sponsor, he has once again agreed to denying my food requests and of course with my permission can be an ass when need be

Well, that's how day 1 went & ready or not day 2 is next.

What's my deal?!

I'm embarrassed to even post anything anymore. I talk all this big crap when I am sitting at my desk about how "today is the day" and "I'm back!" but once I get home and it's time to live up to all my promises I've made - I don't. I start in with the "tomorrow talk" and "maybe next Monday" or "after this holiday". I realized today I have made a 360 and have ended up exactly where I was at last year, weight included. I am not motivated at all and I'm sad once again. I weighed myself this morning and I am back at 205! (right where I was this time last year). I feel horrible.

I signed up for a two year gym membership and I am nearing the end of the first year and haven't did anything with it (that has stuck anyways).I cant let this next year go by with this membership and not change anything about myself. I hate to sound like a broken record but today I will be going back. To be quite honest, I am not pumped at all. I feel (once again) at my lowest on how I have let myself get to this point. But last night I downloaded my LoseIt app once again. ....Really, that's how much I gave up, I deleted the app off my phone.

I know I said previously how I would be posting pictures but I think it would be best to wait on that until the end of the year when I purchase a computer. I think I am currently the only person that doesn't have one at home. I do mainly all my blogging at work but just been busy lately so I am going to have to cut down on my personal use and focus more on work. & Posting pictures from my cell is out of the question.. my smart phone isn't that smart apparently (I tried ... total fail).

So once again ladies, Day 1

Game Plan

I have been thinking all day about jumping back into my workout routines and then it hit me... I'm scared! I'm starting to look back at my post yesterday and boy I sound like big sh*t but I'm starting to feel like it was all talk. (ugh, snap out of it woman!) I think now that I have no more excuses reality is starting to set in and once again I'm fearing the gym.

So here is my game plan....

I think breaking up my overall weightloss goal into small fun mini goals helps make this process seem more achievable and less overwhelming. So I was looking over my upcoming events and the Drake concert is just 31 days away! What's something I can do in 30 days? I'm sure you guessed it.... The 30 Day Shred!

I have tried this video twice and always stop after the 6th day. Every time I even think of that damn DVD I cringe. The PAIN Jillian puts me through in 20 minutes is ridiculous and the next day is no walk in the park! But all BS to the side, it is a hell of a work out and a great way to get my big badonkadonk moving again. So starting tonight, my goal is to start and FINISH the 30 Day Shred.

Tonight I will get measured and take pictures of myself and have them posted tomorrow. Before and after shots are always a plus.

Wish me luck! ;-)

Guess whos back B*&#%*@!

Yesterday was my weigh in day and yes I weighed myself, Iwas just was too tired to deal with my slow Internet and trying to post using my cell. Sucks major donkey ba..backs. :) I'm feeling potty mouthed today.. Sorry try to watch it!

So any who, back to my weigh in... drum roll please......

Yup, back to exactly where I started at! The odd thing is I'm not even upset. Not because I gave up and don't care anymore but I thought about it long and hard (he he he) and I figured why beat myself up?! It hasn't worked for me in the past and only makes me want to give up more so the hell with it. I had an accident and I rested and dealt with that..like I NEEDED TOO.

So that's that!

[[gives self pat on back]]

So with that being said, I had a doctor appointment today and I got the cast and splint off! Woopie!

Because the break on my elbow wasn't a complete break and just a small fracture the cast was removed. I have some stiffness (hehehe .. lol I'm on a roll today) but that is to be expected. As for my finger..my poor,poor, lido finger, it is stuck straight up. I can hardly bend it at all but the Doc said that is still broken and it still has some weeks before I can bend it at a 45 degree angle. He said I may never be able to bend it anymore than that again! Eek now what am I gonna do? I had all these plans that involved my finger at a 90 degree angle! Oh dear!

Really, I'm just happy to be free from all the from all the wraps, slings, and splints. BUT yes there is a but, I still have to wear my splint at night for 3 more weeks just to make sure I don't hurt myself, since I tend to ummm...sleep in my sleep? Yes I can be a wild women in bed!...I guess LOL Dont get me wrong I get why I need it on at night, I am just sick of it and can't wait to be 100% again.

Back to business. Since I am free from my cage now I plan to go back to the gym immediately! Since I have been back to work I have cut down A LOT on snacks but I definitely can trim the fat in a few more places. I'm super juiced to just get back into the swing of things.

Randomness time.

Today is my daddy's birthday! Woohoo! Love my dad so much even though he annoys me from time to time ....to time ... to time... to time again. :)  But hey, gotta love him! He really means the world to me and I know he has and will always have my back. So why not crush his little birthday spirit and tell him I have no plans for him on his special day? LOL He looked super bummed when I hit him with the news that my birthday wishes would be the only thing he would be getting from me this year. He doesn't ask for much but he really enjoys having lunch/dinner with family anytime of the year especially for his birthday. But little does he knows I will be taking him to dinner in just a few hours once I get off of work with some of the fam. cue evil laugh...

Buhahahahaha!

Speaking of special days.....I have quite a few coming up. Yes, birthdays for very special people in my life but I will get to those when the day arrives. But more talk about me.. I have 3, yup you heard right THREE concert I will be attending in December!

1.   Dec 9th: Ginuwine, Jon B, Next, All4One, & Silk. If you haven't heard of any of them, you should check them out on YouTube. Lot of older R&B but I LOVE it.

2.   Dec 10th: Jay-z & Kayne West for the Watch the Throne tour!

3.   Dec 18th: Drake & J.Cole I think I am most excited about this concert because of Drake. I love ALL of his music.

Geesh... I had a lot to say today but I think that pretty much catches you up with everything. I will be posting daily again and I will be including DAILY workout logs? Logs... hmmm I duno if that's the right word to use but I'm sure you get my drift.

One last piece of useless ramble.. I got a new camera! Woohoo! I'll be posting more pics because I don't know about you but pictures always make reading way more fun!

MIA

I feel horrible I havent been able to blog or WORKOUT! I'm finally back at work but I'm basically just here to keep my chair warm. Typing with one fingers sucks so I am going to keep this short. Just wanted to say sorry I havent been around and HELL NO I havent gave up! I will be back soon and ready to kick my own ass at the gym. Talk to you all soon & take care.

Remember me?

Well today is my weigh in day & I honestly thought about skipping it due to my injury and lack of physical activity. Oh & of course all my "poor me" snacks I have been indulging in . Yes, I know bad, bad me but yea who doesn't take advantage a little while they are sick/injured?

As I have said before, good or bad I will be blogging about my progress or lack thereof. Hey, if it was going to be easy & pounds were just flying off, I don't think anyone would have weight issues.But it's not and with all that being said ...here are my numbers...



197lbs!!


Yup that's it...Four pound gain,sucks to be me. To be quite honest, I'm not too mad about it. I know once I'm 100 percent again I'll drop it with no problem. Actually I think I'll drop it once I get to work on the 7th because I won't be home all the time to snack. But once the cast is gone back to the gym I go and hello Mr.Treadmill.


Tata for now.


Pookie